God has been good to me. This summer, although fraught with stress and a miserable telemarketing job, has ended well.

After taking part in the single most stressful show of my life, I fell in love with my co-star. Thankfully, he had been pursuing me for weeks and so we are happily together now. Who knew, even the family likes him. I also quit my job as a telemarketer—freedom!

My semester at school is going well. I am doing well in all my classes and Godspell and Guild Builders are going great. I feel that God is just filling my life with blessings. I am very happy.

Well, the cold winter months keep rolling by and I can hardly believe it’s already February. In some ways I wish it was already over because my days are crammed from beginning to end. We are in crunch time for the play now which seems funny to since we have 2 ½ weeks to go. However, since we have only just now really learnt our music we have to have enough time to throw in heaps of acting, a little dancing and costumes.

All the ladies in the play will have long dresses, hats and bustles which we have to dance in without killing ourselves or each other by treading on the others’ trains. It should be fun. I’m still trying to find a way of piling my hair up on my head so I can still balance a big hat on top of it. I’m still looking.

School is going well; I only took 13 hours this semester so I could recover from too many hours in the fall. I think I’m doing pretty well and am actually enjoying the learning experience once more. We had a small casting change for the character’s love interest. He is still old enough to be my grandfather but at least I can get my arms around this gentleman. He’s very professional and fun so I don’t feel silly playing my part. Such is theatre….
Oh well, nothing more to say so…bye.

Another play (a musical in fact) and back to school. Busy most of the time, but I'm painting and writing again and that's the important thing. Now if I could just get my paintings to turn out exactly as I want them too.

I'll be busy over the next several weeks, but you know what? Everything is a'okay.

Wow, long time, no write. This has been the weirdest semester of my life. I started off with being super happy and busy. Somewhere along the way I lost my focus and allowed life to happen to me instead of happening to life.

I was given the chance to direct a play and I went for it. Nothing bad there. What followed was the worst two months of my life. We had a good cast but our schedule was rehearsal almost every night, almost every day of the week. For hours! I managed to get through the whole thing without getting sick or going insane but I was very close. I was quite vulnerable the whole time and anyone who knows me can understand how I must have felt.

I’m supposed to be the rock.

The play wouldn’t have been so hard if it hadn’t been for a draining relationship I was in at the same time. Soon after the semester started one of the guys I had been in Midsummer Night’s Dream asked me out and we started dating. At first it was first and exciting and I was on cloud nine. But slowly, over time, I started noticing things that were making me very unhappy.

I couldn’t be myself around him. He was so emotional that I had to be careful that I didn’t say anything to offend him. He was jealous of my time with friends and the folks on the play. I couldn’t even talk to my old friends who were guys because he was always afraid that I was more interested in them than him. As a result I started to close off from friends when I shouldn’t have. I feel really bad about that now, but my mistakes were from lack of experience.

In any case it got to the point where I realized that I could be myself with everyone else in the world but him.

This past Sunday I talked to Mom about it and I decided to end it. It was difficult but not as hard as I thought it would be. I free to leave that relationship behind only with the regret that I had spent too much time being unhappy. But now my world is opening up again and I feel like I can see the sky again.

Now I dare to be happy.